O O Ø O O O O
Notice of Delay
In case the pode seems a little late of late.
Let it be noted that, effectively immediately, pintday.org has been placed on a nine-second publishing delay. This delay is a result of past comments and/or rants that may be construed as being politically incorrect. We at Pint Day hold your family values to be particularly important, and to this end, we have instituted a delay mechanism in order to allow time for our material to be appropriately sanitized.
Frequently Asked Questions about the pd.o Delay
- Q: Doesn't 9 seconds seem a bit short?
- A: Not at all. If the CBC can recognize and sanitize Don Cherry's commentary in the 7-seconds they have allotted themselves, our crack team of sanitation engineers can easily do the job in 9. We've allowed the additional 2 seconds to allow time to format the corrections in standards-compliant XHTML 1.1.
- Q: What type of material is to be deemed offensive?
- A: Well, clearly any mention of the word “fuck” is out, as are the words “shit,” “damn,” and “bastard.” The phrases “ass-chapper” and “Randy Wooding” have to go as well. Flashes of nipple, ASCII art or otherwise, are clearly over the line, as are costumes evocative of little green Indians, or interviews with rappers who cuss and whinge about their mothers.
- Q: What about violence?
- A: No, violence is okay. It's only nudity that harms our children.
- Q: Isn't this a violation of the first amendment?
- A: No, you silly (censored). Canada has no First Amendment. That's why we're not as free to speak up here as our American brethren.
- Q: Does this mean you are going to sanitize all your old pd.o content?
- A: Are you insane? The only reason anyone ever visits this site is because we happened to match some combination of dirty words on Google. That, and we're actually quite lazy.
- Q: How long will the delay be in effect?
- A: Until we have all assumed the inoffensive grey tones of politically correct newspeak.
If you have any questions, comments, or concerns about the pd.o delay policy, please direct them to our complaints officer, who will file them appropriately.
Tuesday, Feb 17, 2004
PD DCXXXIX
P.S. One of you dine and dashing (censored)s owes me a beer.