The NFL in Toronto
Given the current state of television, where every show is either predictably unscripted, or painfully sculpted to maximize viewers’ emotional trauma, I have taken to watching predominantly sports.
When my Fellers in Red aren’t playing, this year I have found myself watching whichever NFL game might be on. Being Canadian—and a CFL fan, of course—I have no rooting allegiance to any particular team, and have had a hard time developing one.
I could cheer for the ‘Niners, a waystation in the careers of multiple former Calgary Stampeder greats, but there are no presently active ties.
In that vein, if I was interested in supporting Jeff Garcia’s current team, I could cheer for the Bucs, but I’ll be damned if I ever support a team from Tampa Bay.
There’s the Browns, who are intriguing from an anti-branding perspective, but I’m not sure I could handle all the dawg-talk.
Cheering for the spectacle that is the New England Patriots would be like supporting the New York Yankees. No one likes Yankee Fan.
So instead, I just cheer for the best storyline: Ironman Brett Favre surpassing the mighty Dan Marino in career passing yards, the hi-larious hijinx of the present day Dolphins, the philosophical question as to whether Eli Manning can carry the mail, and so on.
While remaining passingly neutral, I’ve lately begun to wonder if Toronto were to ever win or steal an NFL franchise, could I actually cheer for it?
As the sole Canadian team, the Toronto NFLers would seem an obvious choice, but I’ve fostered a sincere problem with teams from Toronto.
I have deep respect for Pinball Clemons, but I know with certitude the Argonauts are the least relevant team in the CFL. Any success they achieve amounts to a wasted ‘W’ in the win column.
While I cheered mightily when Joe Carter went deep on Mitch Williams in 1993, it’s been hard to stay interested while the Blue Jays have wandered aimlessly in the desert. (Additionally, the Milwaukee Brewers are the official team of Pint Day, for reasons I think are obvious.) And as a libertarian, I feel a kinship with the long-suffering Chicago Cubs, who have the sort of tenacious track record I can respect.
Even getting beyond my genetically Canadian disinterest for basketball, does anyone anywhere take the Raptors seriously?
And every time the Leafs lose, an angel gets its wings.
Would a Toronto-based NFL franchise be able to break my longtime dislike of hogtown teams? I honestly don’t know, but my track record indicates no. Or perhaps yes, but only as an admitted fairweather fan.
Only one thing is certain.
The NFL only serves to fill the occasional gap between hockey games. Flames forever.
ev · PDDCCCIXL
December 22nd, 2007 at 8:11 pm
You have spoken ill of the Patriots. As a New Englander and a long-time fan of the Patriots (yes, I saw Steve Grogan playing quarterback) I’m quite proud of our spectacle. And don’t you realize intimating that Boston/New England sports teams somehow akin to the Yankees is considered felonious assault? And couldn’t you just as easily have had a kinship with the one-and-future long suffering Red Sox? Why the hate towards my home neck-o-the-woods? Is it all those times I made fun of Canada? I knew it!
January 7th, 2008 at 10:41 pm
I am pulling for your Patriots just so they can wipe the smug champagne-popping attitudes off the 1972 Dolphins. What a bunch of knobs.
Picking between the Red Sox and the Yankees is like picking between the Democrats and Republicans: they’re indistinguishable to those without game program.
If it helps, Helly, I’m a big fan of Bobby Orr.
January 9th, 2008 at 11:21 am
If Toronto was awarded an NFL franchise Buffalo would lose theirs. Half of the Bills stadium comes from the Toronto area.
January 9th, 2008 at 10:02 pm
Actually, I had assumed the NFL franchise would be the Toronto Bills.