O O Ø O O O O
On Architectural Guidelines
Part 1
Original Folk: Hello New Guy. Welcome to our club.
New Guy: Thank you, Original Folk. This is a swell club. I’m very glad you let me be a member.
OF: We’re a super little community.
NG: You are! In fact, you’re such a super group, I feel it would be a shame if someone were to come along and ruin it.
OF: Who would do that, New Guy?
NG: Just about anyone could. For instance, what if we don’t like his tie?
OF: We don’t understand.
NG: I like your ties, Original Folk. Don’t you like mine?
OF: We like your tie very much. In fact, it’s super. What does this have to do with our club?
NG: Anyone could come along and wear a tie we might not like. Where would we be then?
OF: We’re having trouble following the relevance of these things, but you seem to know what you’re talking about, and your tie is super.
NG: Exactly. We should write up a rule about ties.
OF: Will you do that for us?
NG: It is done.
OF: Super.
NG: Super.
Part 2
New Interloper: Hey folks! This is a super club.
Defender of the Faith (Formerly New Guy): Oh. Knit tie.
OF: Is that bad?
DF: Yes. New Interloper’s tie does not meet our guidelines.
NI: How so? It is a super tie.
DF: Maybe so, but it is a knit tie. Our guidelines state clearly that ties are to be rep ties.
NI: But he is not even wearing a tie.
DF: He has been grandfathered, and so is not subject to our guidelines.
NI: And he is wearing a bowtie.
DF: He is not a relevant precedent.
NI: Why is this happening?
DF: We wish to preserve the rep-tie traditions of our group.
NI: ¿The rep-tie traditions of your group of four, one of whom is open-collared, one of whom wears a bowtie, and one of whom has been a member for approximately two minutes before I arrived?
DF: Those are the rules.
NI: What can I do to fit in?
DF: You must change your tie, so you will look like what our guidelines require.
NI: So it’s the look, and not the knit aspect, per se?
DF: Well, no, not as such, per se.
NI: So if I were to Jiffy Marker on some diagonal stripes…
DF: That would be super. And could you trim up the bottom?
NI: How so?
DF: Rep ties come to a point. Yours is square. We can’t have that.
NI: Very well.
DF: Super.
NI: Super.
OF: Does anyone else feel queasy?
Il Pelicano
January 22, 2008
OOØOOOODCCCLVII
February 21st, 2008 at 10:47 am
this is a super little parable.