O O Ø O O O O
Internal Memo
To: All staff
Subject: New sick leave policy
It has been brought to my attention that the attendance record at this company is a disgrace to our gracious benefactor, who at your own request, has given you your job.
Due to the lack of consideration for your jobs with so fine a company, as shown in such frequent absenteeism, it has become necessary for us to revise some of our policies. The following changes are in effect as of today:
Sickness
No excuse. We will no longer accept your doctorʑs word as proof, as we believe that if you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
Death (Other than your own)
This is no excuse. There is nothing you can do for them, and we are sure that someone else with a lesser position can attend to the arrangements. However, if the funeral can be held in the late afternoon, we will be glad to let you off one hour earlier, provided that your share of the work is ahead enough to keep the job going in your absence.
Leave of Absence (For an operation)
We are no longer allowing the practice. We wish to discourage any thoughts that you may have need of an operation as we believe as long as you are an employee here you will need all of whatever you have and you should not consider having anything removed. We hired you as you are and to have anything removed would certainly make you less than we bargained for.
Death (Your own)
This is an acceptable excuse, but we would like two weeks notice as we feel it is your duty to teach someone else your job.
Also
Entirely too much time is being spent in the restrooms. In the future, we will follow the practice of goign in alphabetical order. For instance, those whose names begin with “A” will go from 8:00 to 8:15, “B” will go from 8:15 to 8:30, and so on. If you are unable to go at your time, it will be necessary to wait until the day when your turn comes again.